I'm Dancing with Me

My mother made her transition in December 2022. I am in the middle or beginning…depending on the day…of my grief. There are times when I can go on “business as usual” then there are days when I am overwhelmed with both the absence AND presence of my mother. My mother was everything I could have wanted and some. Our stages of healing and growth; friendship and love, cannot be expressed in my words alone. The best way I can show you is how I LIVE my life.

My mother was the smoothest dancer I know…and she tried…for years, many years, to teach me her moves and grooves. She laughed at me AND encouraged me. She smiled at my efforts AND chuckled that I was the child that didn’t quite get her light feet.

A month or so before she passed…after one of my trips back home from visiting her…I started listening to a playlist I made for her. And I danced. I videoed myself dancing and sent it to her. She said, “Ke…you’re getting it” I cried…I mean until I couldn't breathe…but

I danced.

I danced and cried.

I am still dancing with me…until I get it…because I finally get why she danced with herself. It is the comfort and peace and love that comes with dancing with Kenisha.

Mama, I get it. You were always showing us…always teaching us with your life.

Mama, I get it! I am dancing with me. And I will keep dancing until I am in the fullness of liberty and love. And every time I dance with myself, I am dancing with you…until I am dancing with you again!

Kenisha